fear

[nobodydatswho]

tell me wat u think:


FEAR
fear is a trap for your mind
fear will make you freeze where you stand
fear is a maze created by the devil
fear is the maze in which we get caught
fear is just a state of mind
a state of mind that is deafiningly silent
fear prevents you from finding a way out
out of the chaos and darkness of your mind
fear is like a cobra
moving swiftly and silently unseen
attacking its prey with no sign if its coming
it paralyzes its prey with one swift movement
there is no antidote
no quick fix
no way out
no way out of this world of fear....
no way out of this world of pain....
no way out of this world....
but Death

[Matt]

I fear cobras!!!!. the world is not of fear, the world is not of pain, the world is of many thing beautiful, ugly. But in most cases its what you make of it and if you make it of fear, pain well..... thats what its going to be.

Your poem is good in many ways, and you have hidden talent that will rise.

Keep it up. Your good

Matt.

[nobodydatswho]

thanx i have better thats just one i havent shown n e body. i did say panther instead of cobra but it didnt fit with the next few lines so i changed it to cobra. my friends dont understand poetry thats y i come here.

[aj]

That's a strong point of view you have there. I agree with Matt that over time you can evolve very nicely. Have you tried to write Haiku, Cinquains or Tanka? They're great exercise. Try them out and tell me how you like them.
-AJ