Post by escapethroughpoetry on Sept 23, 2014 0:40:48 GMT -5
I choke down my coffee
It was good just a minute ago but it's gotten cold.
I'm trying to focus
But I just can't get my mind to stay on changing radians to degrees.
In a two weeks it'll be 3 years since you passed.
Three years goes by so damn fast.
It feels like just yesterday my heart broke more than it ever has before.
Just yesterday that I openly cried in front of strangers
Went into my room and collapsed into my pillows trying to shut the world out.
Grabbed your shirt, the only belonging of yours I had
And wrapped myself in my blankets trying to feel you hug me again.
For the next month I'd see you everywhere
In the grocery story with some strange family I didn't know.
Walking past me down the street and not even looking up at me.
When I got out of school I'd expect you to be there to walk me home.
Hands in your pockets
Leaning back slightly like you didn't have a care in the world.
Smiling as I walked toward you.
I had my first choir concert the next month.
I remember telling you about it and that I wanted you to come.
I had to sing that night and hold back the tears that wanted to stream down my face.
You were gone and I had no way of getting you back.
You were just gone.
You are gone.
The last text message you sent me said how much you love me and my brother.
I remember reading it and thinking that it was weird that you kept sending me messages like that.
I think I ignored it for a bit.
When I texted you back I said we both loved you too and asked if everything was okay.
But you never got back to me.
Your phone still works so every now and then I'll call and leave you a message.
Tell you how my day has been and what's new with me
Tell you how much I love you.
I like to think that somehow you listen to them and smile.
But I choke down my coffee
Put on a smile
And continue on like nothing is wrong.
It was good just a minute ago but it's gotten cold.
I'm trying to focus
But I just can't get my mind to stay on changing radians to degrees.
In a two weeks it'll be 3 years since you passed.
Three years goes by so damn fast.
It feels like just yesterday my heart broke more than it ever has before.
Just yesterday that I openly cried in front of strangers
Went into my room and collapsed into my pillows trying to shut the world out.
Grabbed your shirt, the only belonging of yours I had
And wrapped myself in my blankets trying to feel you hug me again.
For the next month I'd see you everywhere
In the grocery story with some strange family I didn't know.
Walking past me down the street and not even looking up at me.
When I got out of school I'd expect you to be there to walk me home.
Hands in your pockets
Leaning back slightly like you didn't have a care in the world.
Smiling as I walked toward you.
I had my first choir concert the next month.
I remember telling you about it and that I wanted you to come.
I had to sing that night and hold back the tears that wanted to stream down my face.
You were gone and I had no way of getting you back.
You were just gone.
You are gone.
The last text message you sent me said how much you love me and my brother.
I remember reading it and thinking that it was weird that you kept sending me messages like that.
I think I ignored it for a bit.
When I texted you back I said we both loved you too and asked if everything was okay.
But you never got back to me.
Your phone still works so every now and then I'll call and leave you a message.
Tell you how my day has been and what's new with me
Tell you how much I love you.
I like to think that somehow you listen to them and smile.
But I choke down my coffee
Put on a smile
And continue on like nothing is wrong.